Climb every mountain...follow every rainbow

I'M BACK!

So it turns out that my blog is not a fan of posting 200+ photo in one blog!

200+ photos that is how many I have taken this past two weeks that I wanted to share! 

Yup it has been a busy 2 weeks folks! 

I'll post a few at a time so that I have more blogs to post! 

Spread the love, right?! 

So I will start out with pretty much where the week started!

A team from Azusa Pacific University arrived Friday May 22nd. 

With my boss away on business, it was up to us assistants to run the show. 

I have to say, I work with a group of amazing people! They did such a great job!

Saturday we took the team to a local mountain. By all comparisons to mountains

in China, this one is a hill to be sure. {I asked my Tourist Geography teacher later that week

how big the mountain was that we had gone up and she said "Eh, not very big!"}

You could have fooled me though! 

There were moments when all I wanted was for someone to 

put me out of my misery! For the first little bit it was a real downer!

Here I was, a week away from my 31st birthday feeling like 

a fat,out of shape cow! I thought Zumba was helping me get into shape, but 

with the way I was huffing and puffing and having a hard time lifting my

legs, you wouldn't have known I had done any sort of physical exercise in years!

This was just at the beginning! We had already walked up the drive, which was

a rather steep hill in it of itself, and then we hit these steps! STEPS! Something I try to 

avoid here at home even!

They all went on ahead and let me rest here on the steps

 I then caught up with them later at a neat little rest stop. 

They all were sweet and did a little cheer that I had made it.

It was while I was looking up at the rest of the way we had to

trek that it hit me......

Not even four months ago.,...

I couldn't walk a step! I couldn't even put one foot in front

of the other without severe pain!

But here I was not four months later, walking up not only a mountain

but mountain stairs! 

The view started changing for me!

It was no longer trying to survive

It wasn't just trying to make it up the hill

It was enjoying the view from a place that

in many ways, I had no right to be seeing!

I look at these photos now and am still in awe of the view!

A quote from Sense and Sensibility comes to mind

"Is there any felicity in the world superior to this?"

I mentioned what a great testament to Father's healing,

my being on the mountain side was, and while I got some reply grunts and

acknowledging head nods, I don't really think anyone but me truly understood what a momentous occasion that really was!

They were all worried about my back

the entire team was super great about it and I 

felt really bad for making them worry so much!

Here they should be just enjoying their time on the mountain

and both my partners and the visitors were all checking in on me

from time to time, asking if I was doing alright, if I needed to stop and wait for them

and they would come back for me soon, etc etc.

But once I started, there was no stopping me. I was getting to the top!

I was going to say that I climbed to the top of  Juci mountain

in His strength just four months after a big scare!

And I did!

We made it all the way to the top!

It was beautiful! And it felt even better!

I could have cried when we made it all the way

to the tip top and looked over!

I said a Thank you Father! 

And was once again in awe of how amazing He is,

both in the splendor of the scene I got to see

and in giving me the ability to get to the top!

Some of the lovely girls I get to work with!

It is going to be super tough to say goodbye!

Even more now that I have gotten to know them better

through working SO closely with this team!

The team from APU was a riot to boot!

We enjoyed a rest and photo ops at the top.

And then it was time to head down!

That hurt too! haha!

But I made it!

And I could even walk the next day! 

I wasn't bed ridden!

Ask, and it shall be given you; 

seek and ye shall find;

knock and it shall bee opened unto you.

He is good! He is faithful!

He is Mighty! He is powerful!

The exam

I just got my midterm back for what is probably the biggest/most important class. It combines everything, though we just call it Intensive Reading. I knew I had not done well on the exam, knew it. It didn't bother me! Test scores don't worry me, I kept telling people. And so knowing I had failed, I never asked to see my grade. Yet today, she pulled out the exams and I took a look. I held it together long enough to get out of the room, but I am not ashamed to admit that the tears didn't stay at bay too much past the closing of the elevator doors.

Not getting a 100 on an exam is ok. I have always been ok with not being smart! I was never smart! That honestly is ok with me. You will not find me trying to convince a person that I can do higher maths or that I can think up theories and deep hypothosis'. I am not smart, and that is fine with me. But I hate being dumb. Not getting a 100 on an exam just means you didn't know everything on the test. Looking down at a 49 on a test, to me that says you're dumb. Did I mention I hate being dumb?

My fall back is always to say that at least I can speak. At least I know it is that I can't ever do all that well on tests no matter how hard I try. Yet the truth is, I have gone to every class, I practice, I do study {not a ton, I will admit to that!} I try to learn and I do put my heart into what I am here to do, so seeing a 49 staring back at me when I know that there was a possible 103 to be had....yeah, that doesnt say not smart that says dumb. Saying that at least I can speak, at least I can talk to people so I am learning something, doesn't really hold much weight when I sit down next to someone who has never studied but has picked up on so much just from living here and can carry on a conversation possibly better than even I could. People can learn to speak, never having stepped foot in a classroom, never having spent the hours in books that I have. So even though in the end I am able to let the bad grade slide off my back, I can not lie and say that looking at it doesnt prick like a sword to the lungs.

I did my usual song and dance, though on my own this time as I have not shared the news with anyone else. Trying to find that good side of it. Telling myself things like “You got a 90+ on your speeking exam! You have been told over and over again what a great job you did in the performance the other night! You got a 13 out of 12 on the essay portion of this exam you failed and she said, not for the first time either, how great your writing is.” Those are all meant to help boost my bruised ego, which then of course made me ashamed to be patting myself on the back so I quickly changed to looking for what I could learn out of this for furthering my work for Him and to be a light!

I can speak with kids pretty well.

I can act, even in Chinese.

I don't need to have a good grade or be able to read in order to play with kids.

I know enough to share with people.

I can still sing.

I can still write a good story, even in Chinese.

These are all things I hope to use for Him. And yet still, as I was going over those things, something stuck out to me. I, I, I, I, I, I.

It hurts like crazy, because once again I am coming face to face with one of my biggest fears and worries. My life is not where it should be and I am not living 100% fully for Him like I need to be. I a still so selfish, still trying to do so much on my own strength, still wanting to prove to people that I can be the best at something, proving to people that I can be a good Follower of Him and that I won't fall...and yet all of that focuses on the wrong thing! I need to be weak so that He can be shown strong through me...but He doesn't need me! I am so good at this self centered stuff that I can even take a good thing and make it about me instead of where it should be! Is it a good thing that I can speak to kids and act in a play and sing and share? Yeah! I am so thankful for all of that. But I keep taking that and using it as a means to pat myself on the back and say that I don't need to work harder in other areas to be more like what I am to be! That because I can speak to kids, its ok if I can't read and write properly. Even sometimes going so far as to say that because I note the downfalls in my life and how I live, that once I identify them I can just keep moving on cause at least I noticed them!

Maybe He is not going to use me by utilizing my ability to act an Evil Step Mother, or a courageous warrior who takes on a kingdom with 300 men. He may not even use the fact that I can speak and identify with kids in two languages. Again and again He shows me that what He is using is the broken parts of me. The weak, torn, cracked, bits that I keep trying to puff up with the things I think are good. What I want to learn is that it is not about the strengths or weaknesses I have that will make me useful. It is Him. I know that I do not always do the best job of making Him or my family proud. He knows that better than anyone.

Please don't think that I have it all together and just need praise and pats on the back. Please keep buzzing for me that I will strive to put Him first in my failures and achievements. That I might press towards the prize as one who has not yet obtained it,ever mindful of the fact that I am not worthy of the gift I have been given, and always steadfast in the goal.  

Campus

Today while I was in the office, two of my teachers were also there.

They were speaking very seriously and seemed very 

intent on the computer they were sitting at. 

I really hadn't been paying attention to what was going on, 

and I was trying not to listen to what they were saying, as it seemed important!

I knew it was none of my business and was something that had made one of them

decide against leaving to go home at one point! {She was on her way out the door and ended

up grabbing a chair and coming back in to sit at the desk} 

As time went on, I needed to get something in another room. Upon my 

return, I happened to glace at the screen and saw the computer screen they were sitting at. 

All of the sudden, the words I had been able to understand but had been letting go

in one ear and out the other started to make sense:

"If I move there, he will be able to capture my piece in one move."

"Can I jump over him there? Is that a good move?"

"What do you think the next move should be?"

etc

They were playing a game! 

I have to say, as silly as it might be, to see the two of them sitting back

and relaxing together as they played a computerized version of Checkers or something,

it just made my day! 

#ItsTheLittleThings

The sun was so bright and gorgeous today, I just had to go out in it for a bit!

So I put off the homework for a bit and took a walk around campus again this afternoon. 

So...I took photos to share!

Princess Peach!

My alarm went off at 7 like always, 

I have two of them actually, and they

both rang, I turned them both off, and rolled over.

Just a few more minutes, i told myself. 

Then, I woke up....at 8! I'm suppose to be in class

at 8! 10 minutes, later, I was in class! Hated being late

but so glad I don't live any further than three floors away!!

I've said it before, and I will say it many more times:

I am SO thankful for Skype!

It allows me to keep in touch with all the most important 

people in my life!

2 years ago this time, my wonderful friend was letting me

cry on her shoulder about some things that were hurting

me. She didn't even need full explanations at times. 

I will never forget how she responded when I sent her a text 

that said I NEEDED to go for a walk. She came to meet me, 

saw I was in pain {heart pain} and didn't even bat an eye

when I burst into tears! Turning to her husband, she said that we 

were going to be awhile and that he should just go on home, she

would take care of me. We had some of the best fun times, and she 

{and her hubby!!} helped me get through some of the hard

homesick and other struggles that come with living so far away

from the home you know. Though we are miles apart and don't

know when that will change, she has remained my close friend

and I am SO so thankful to have her in my life! We don't even 

always agree on things, and it just seems to make our friendship

stronger! 

Someday my friend! Someday I will get to see you again! And

give you a big old hug! This time, the tears will be from joy!

#ItsTheLittleThings

Campus!

It was SUCH an amazingly gorgeous day today! 

The sun was out, the sky was actually blue there were no clouds, 

no big wind, the little fluffies were at a minimum! 

So instead of staying inside and eating my lunch,

I went out for a nice walk in between classes. Was really hoping

it would also help me stay awake as I was having a hard time with that

in my first class! I woke up this morning feeling tired and not so great. Pretty 

much the same way I fell asleep! haha!  Here are some of the things I saw on my walk around campus.

        This is the path that goes along the little river by SIAS. It HURTS!! The stones you see are each sticking up sideways and are not covered very well at all! I have walked it in thick soled shoes and found it to be uncomfortable, but today I was in flip flops {Don't tell my chiropractors please!} and the few feet I had to walk to get to the graffiti wall were so painful! I decided not to continue on that path but instead turn around and head back a different way.
   















       
  We have a group coming Friday from America to be hosted here at SIAS for a week. They will be doing a bit of Cultural studies and other activities all put on by my department. One of the ideas that we had for the week {And I knew I might end up regretting it when I suggested it.} is a scavenger hunt of sorts. We will give the groups photos of things, landmarks, buildings, notable monuments in and around SIAS {all the way to downtown!} and they must find where they are and take a photo there. The idea is to get them to ask people out on the street to help them find these things, as they have all studied a bit of Chinese and their main purpose in being here is to create opportunities to speak with locals. Though the prep was started by another assistant, she only had three photos, so I decided to take a few more while I was out on my walk, and then from these choose a few to use for the hunt this coming Sunday. Its kinda hard though, since for me some of these things are just SO EASY to find since I have been coming here for so many years, while to others they may seem to obscure. Then again, I don't want to make it too easy and have this activity over in moments!

 I'm not sure that you can see it...this plant is covered in the tree fuzz that has been floating around all week. It looked rather pretty glinting in the light, but made me realize just why my allergies were bugging me more lately!

There can you see it any better on this photo to the right? It kinda looks like Spider Webs, {Why I thought that needed to be capitalized, I don't know} but really its really the tree fuzzies!

As you can tell.....I need some sun! Like REALLY need it!

But it makes me more popular here! 

"OH! You so white!!"

Gardening on campus is made 'simple' by never removing the flowers

from the packages they come in! That way, when they die, all you do

is throw it all away. And it doesn't take long to switch around an arrangement,

since there is little to no digging to do. You just pick up the old flower container, and

place the new one in its place.

 This is one of the photos I am contemplating using in the hunt.

Look everyone! The library is beginning to have walls!

The characters that follow the number 6 say the same thing.

The first is in traditional, the second in simplified. 

It made me realize once again that while I think it is so

hard to learn chacters now, and here on mainland, I can't

imagine if I was trying to learn traditional in Guangdong, Hong Kong, or Taiwan!

This sounds like a humble brag, but its not.

This is just an actual thought I had today:

While listening to a Josh Groban {"I am Josh GROVAN!!"} 

song earlier today it popped into my head

"I wish I knew a second language!" 

It took me a few minutes to realize the dumbness 

of that thought, to be honest!

It is just that now, at times, it fails to dawn on me 

that it is a different language. 

#ItsTheLittleThings